Friday, February 25, 2005

Behind Swollen Eyes

Guys… u know that certain races at certain time of year will travel afar and then go round and round in circles around a rock or something, and that some of them will almost certainly die in a stampede? Well…. They got something like that in Thailand too and I did it.

The Wednesday that just passed was a holiday. I got no idea what holiday it was but it seems to be related to Buddhism. Was asked by a friend to go to the “Temple Festival”. Actually, it is simply a big pasar malam around the temple and every temple in Thailand had this going on.
It was nighttime that I went, lucky for me or else my balls will cook. Walked everywhere, see hawkers selling fried bugs beetles and all. No way I was gonna have that for dinner. So we found a kuay-teow stall and decided to eat there. We had to take off our shoes and sit on the floor to eat from the low tables. Quite interesting.

After dinner, we needed to do the “vien-tian” thingy. Walk three rounds around the temple. Heck… only 3 rounds, not too difficult and so I decided to do it. Went to donate 20 baht, took a lotus, 3 incense and one candle. Lighted the incense and wanted to do the walk-round-in-circle thing already, only to be told to wait. Wait for what?….. Wait for the monks to start and lead.
Piangs… hell begins.. more and more people gather.. more and more incense burning.. whole place so smoky suddenly and no more place to stand. Finally got some strange chanting on the speakers and I see botak orange clad monks leading. Then I never knew it could take so long to walk one round. Blardee 15 minutes!!!! So many people.. all so pushy…My hands were initially religiously clasped together holding the incense and lotus. After one round, lotus has turned to lethal hammer held in single hand and incense were weapons of terror to clear the way.

When I finished the three rounds, my incense had long expired and my eyeballs were well smoked like salmon. My BO was 10 times more intoxicating and my preparation pores water holes. Buay tahan.

Thursday I woke with a swollen right eye… Something is wrong. Today lower eyelid swell like ball, smooth and shiny like dick head. Saw a doctor and taking antibiotics now. Next time go to Thai temple must wear diving gear, no kidding.

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