Friday, March 30, 2007

Lets go Shit

There is such a place called Bang Sai. Well Bang Sai back home means Go-Shit. I just had to stop my car and take his picture. Can’t help it. Too darn funny.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Hotel Pok Pok

These are the normal Thai fug joints that I did mention before in previous blogs and now I have pictures to show. Been working on site for 2 weeks now and stayed several nights in such accommodations. We normally finish our work at ungodly 5am. Need some good sleep and a good bath.

Driving into pok pok hotels, the place will normally be of near total darkness. Then the attendant will eagerly appear like a ghost from thin air. With his torch, he will attentively guide your car over to an empty house, torch swinging excitedly. Slide your car into the porch, give the usher the THB$400 (SGD$16) and you have the room. In the next 10 minutes, he will arrive with overly size towels which are supposed to be your blanket for the night. I think the towels are not meant to keep your warm, but to wipe your eruptive cum when you are done with your bitch on bed. A lone bottle of mineral water will be provided as compliments. If you have arrived alone, he might ask if you want rabbit or chicken (in Thai of course). Rabbit means young fresh teenage girls while chicken means the more experienced older types. The toilet might have glass walls, depending on which room your take. A cheap attempt on a classy feel. It even has water running down the glass but that won’t be working as the water pump would have given up on live long ago. The shower head in the bathroom is normally moldy old. The pipe will tension and swing the shower head to suicide position. Water spraying directly onto the water heater on the wall so you might get electrocuted when shampooing and the rabbit will rob your wallet and leave.

Translucent glass walls.. I had trouble shitting. I could see my workmates in the room. They can see me sitting and shitting. They can smell me.

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

A Debut with the Sea

I am going for the above. A not so well known island off Phuket I will go. I don’t care if that is one of the most expensive resorts in Phuket even for a Singaporean. I need my brain activity to cease functioning at extreme thresholds of burn out. My debut with the sea is next month and I am looking forward. Meanwhile.. I am cleaning shit.

Statistics: There is a 90% chance that, when working with Thais on crucial projects, will always result in the shit hitting the fan. No one does anything to prevent the shit from splattering and no one ever thinks ahead. Sometimes, it’s not about the shit hitting the fan, but the fan being put into a pail of shit and turned on. Correction…. Make that a bunch of fans being put into a pail of mushy shit and turned on.

Anyway, back to the resort. It cost THB$10,000 per night. That’s a hefty SGD$400 but I’ll go anyway, I deserve self indulgence to reward my worn soul. It was a recent tour event held at one of Thailand’s many convention halls. Being smart now, I parked my car and took the MRT. It’s wiser to do that and I encourage all foreigners in Bangkok to do that where possible. It really saves a lot of time compared to being stuck in jams. Remember, Bangkokians prefer to live their lives out in cars.

Booth of the mentioned resort looks empty. Then I made contact. And only after that, curious onlookers came and suddenly there was a small crowd. I hated crowds. See, in Thailand it’s like this. Anything that looks extremely elegant gives conclusion to pricy tag and no one will dare come. Face value thing exist here like among mainland yellow people, so better not to ask if think cannot afford. But when conversation already in progress, hang close and listen without ever having to loose face with unintended shocking expression revealing monetary status when answered on the price tag.

Filled the forms and made the deposit. Seems like I was the poorest fellow there. I had Gold card. The other two high-so (high society) customers were paying with their Platinum. My accountant has a pay of below THB$20,000 and she’s got a Platinum – a Platinum with a credit limit of THB$40,000 (SGD$1600)…. guess that explains the inferior standards of banks in Thailand.

Most of the resorts on show were sub THB$1000 per night. Those were very crowded. It was a fair for Thais. Printed on some brochures “price for Thai People Only”. The standard Thai travel budget is of this level. In such resorts you will find mostly Thais and the handful of foreign backpackers. Wise on money. I tracked back my time spent in Thailand and surveyed my experience. Normally Thai people stay in sub THB$500 accommodations. I, of course stayed in many before during site work and they are really crappy. Most of these hotels have a small basket with packets of condom for convenience. However, I did not use them to accident fuck my fellow workmates no matter how drunk. You could also rent such rooms by the hour, typically about THB$200. Accommodation at THB$1000 is considered expensive. Anything above is ludicrous on the wallet of Thais.

THB$10,000 per night is 10 times that of ludicrous. I think I am shit stupid to pay for that kinda hotel. THB$10,000 I could rent a local apartment for two months, even three. Goota go, gotta try, gotta indulge.

Monday, March 05, 2007

Insurance No Buy

Visited one of Gig’s uncle in hospital yesterday. Darn scary, his life slowly being eaten away by colon cancer. Gotta eat more vegetables boys and girls. I asked them if the uncle was on insurance. No. Thais don’t buy insurance. Why? Waste of money. The money could be used better on current things – they said. So what do they do when one falls sick and is in need of money for a major surgery? They will borrow from all relatives around. The family bond is strong and all, they expect, will help. This is the mentality here. Insurance companies may think such is a big market of unexploited opportunities but the fact is that only a fraction of the minority well educated pool of Thais are into buying policies. Such is the trend here that on such a low salary scale, priorities are put forth on immediate things such as food, lodging, transport, fashion and for the middle income - entertainment. Even the near fifties population does not have savings to fall back on and dependability on others is a strong inherent trend. Why do they not plan for the future? Two simple answers. One which is just being unable to because one is financially as it is. Second, which is majority and from what I gather around me is that, why worry about future? Why think ahead. Just relax, don’t worry be happy. Worry later.

What’s a good business for the population? Credit companies seems to be doing very well, there are so many of them here. And when one cannot service the loan and is faced with a penalty that could end in jail? Borrow from loan sharks. Eventually still unable to recover the situation? Sell body, sell daughter. It is still very popular to sell daughters. It is still good luck to be having a daughter then a son. A daughter can generate income for the family through simple ways when compared to a son. It is rumored the stall near where I work selling Thai papaya salad also sell their daughter. I finally understand why there are countless TV jokes where scantily dressed busty girls pound the salad so hard she made her boobs look like a wild Viking ride.

Go borrow, go beg, go steal if out of options. Such is life here. Sad, it’s an unfair world one would say. But hey look, when is the world ever fair? Entrepreneurs in this era so glorified by media in fast paced countries. Ever wonder what it takes to be one? Money from the spoon stuck in your asses dears. These facts of Thai lives mentioned, are the exposed reality of things revealed through enough span of time in this land of smiles. We used to be able to only see the lighter side of Thailand as packed tourist on our vacations.