Getting to Koh Tao, by Lomprayah and it Sucks

Koh Tao is an island north of Samui, north beyond the full moon party island of Phangan. No direct flights and the only way to get there is by your personal yacht or the daily ferries departing from Bangkok, Hua Hin, Chumphon or Samui.



I recommend the Chumphon route, so as I did enjoying the 7 hours drive from Bangkok at 3am in the morning, followed by the Lomprayah twin hulled high speed ferry departing at 1pm. The boat journey was an hour and a half. One could get to Chumphon in a short 5 hours if needed to, forgoing all the coffee breaks, the toilet visits, the export outlet shopping and the meal stops along route in mega petrol stations so many in Thailand.

Take your time, drive a slow pace and enjoy the pleasant experience from darkness till dawn and into the daylight morning I say. Recently, they had a new service introduced. Its called Solar Air. You take a propeller plane from Bangkok to Chumphon airport, then a bus followed by the ferry service. No need to wake that early in the morning for self-drive. It cost about THB3,000 one way.


Bookings for the ferry could be done in advance over the Lomprayah web site, that was what I did and luckily I did so too. If not, one will have to endure the slow services of the check in counter as I write later. Getting to the ferry terminal is a challenge. The directional map on the website ain’t clear at all, could end up in Burma. So, in this post I had attached a snapshot of Google Maps for references (Long 10°21'30.60"N, Lat 99°16'1.80"E).


Lomprayah in Chumphon, they provide safe overnight parking looked after by the residence for THB50 per day to watch over your precious ride. Just make sure you get a shady spot for your car if you do not want it to be baking under the glaring sun. And to do so, wait for the return ferry from Koh Tao an hour before your trip, many folks will be driving their cars out on the return trip to Bangkok and that’s when you have the luxury to choose lots under the shade. Not much point arriving too early in advance as the parking could be full.



Now, heaps of whining, Lomprayah, no queue system, no baggage services and very slow checking-in process. Checking-in took more then 10 minutes per person as the counter was only a served by single slow laid back country woman scribbling your bookings onto notebooks. They have speed limits in terms of work but strangely, no one in the queue was complaining. Haven’t they heard of computerization?


Then when it was time, I had to lug and roll my baggage over the fifty meters of creaky wooden jetty under the searing sun, I got my tan even before landing on the beach. The ferry has two levels, the top so labeled VIP and you will have to pay THB100 extra to be in (it was THB 50 last year). But you may not get it as wished. Experienced riders rushed towards the boat in an instant after the onset of announcement to board. I had sat in the mass area below, powered by only three air conditioning systems. It was hot and humid, it ain’t a pleasant ride.


And so on my second trip to Koh Tao, I opted for booking VIP when checking in, ensuring I would get that seat upstairs instead of sauna room below. I was given a special VIP sticker, pasted onto my shirt, it was suppose to indicate to all that I had special privileges. Then, no special privilege encountered, I still had to join the long queue as per normal. Waltzing into the VIP with expectations that there will be available seats waiting for me, I was greeted by a scene of chaos instead. Large noisy families, hordes of noisy Thai folks engaged in frantic throwing of belongings onto empty seats reserving them for their mothers, kids and whatsoever extended families further down the queue. And they did not have the VIP stickers, they just conquered that VIP room in a stampede. To top it off, I did not see any staffs of Lomprayah coming in to check on who had the VIP stickers and who not, by right those who did not had to pay that extra THB100, it did not happen. And when I asked the Lomprayah staffs about why those people were not being charged, here was how it went:

Me (to Staff of Lomprayah):
Excuse me, we are supposed to pay extra when we sit VIP right?

Staff:
Yes sir.

Me:
Why no one come to check on me and ask me to pay extra THB100?

Staff (started looking at each other to find excuse, realizing they forgot to check who was VIP and who not):
Oh we will do so….

Paused… confusion among staffs…

Staff:
Er sir, can we have a look at your ticket… ?

Me hand over ticket… .

Staff: Oh sir… you already are VIP, we no charge you extra.

Me: What about the others? Did you check on them?

Paused… confusion among staffs…

Staff: Oh no need sir, we know who VIP and who are not. So we will charge those without VIP tickets and stickers.

Me: Why I never see you charge those with normal stickers then? I have been sitting up there for 1 hour already?

Staff: That’s because we know those without the VIP stickers currently upstairs had already paid for the extra VIP charge when checking in, the check in staffs had radioed us to tell us who they are.

Bull shit, utter bullshit. Totally bullshit, how could they recognized them all? And if they did paid extra, they would have got VIP stickers!! Lomprayah is full of bullshit but why should they bother to improve services since they are the only company that monopolizes the only ferry to Koh Tao!! Assholes.

Working here for 7 years, that day, I realized why my Thai friends had told me repeatedly that Thai people are very good at telling lies in my course of work as a warning. They don’t call it lies, my Thai mates had said, they simply call it “don’t finish the sentences” that’s all. Thais are very good at twisting the story and changing the facts. This, I totally witnessed on that day.

So my advice to all, forget about opting for VIP during check in and paying in advance. Many of us with VIP stickers ended with no seats because of these ill-mannered folks who horded the VIP level. Pity the other Caucasian tourists who were squeezed out of VIP rooms and made confused by the Lomprayah staffs who gave all kinds of bullshit reasoning. I am just wondering what the Lomprayah staffs had told those who paid but did not get a seat. I got mine because I screamed at the Lomprayah staffs when I had no seats during the beginning of the journey.

My holiday in Koh Tao was almost perfect except for Lomprayah. But do we have a choice?

Full photo sets here under Koh Tao Feb 2010 & Koh Tao Apr 2011.

Live Borderless - Charm Churee Villa, Koh Tao

Live Borderless, not LG LCD TV, but a resort I will blog about. Live Borderless, see the view out into the gulf spanning the horizon from my personal patio overhanging off the cliffs as the long tail boast sped by. Every morning, I woke to the warm radiance of the rising sun under the shadows of the weathered cliffs. The gentle salty breeze caressed as I stood looking down below into my personal aquarium. The spotted green crabs sunning their shells warmed up as the vibrant fishes played amongst the corals. It was the second time I was there, a hint that I found this resort worth a second visit.



Not your average budget type hotel, but worth every dear Baht I had earned. The resort had been around since 2002, but the corrosive waft of the sea had taken its toll on the wooden huts that makes up the accommodation of this dwelling. I had stayed in unit 34, for the second time. A one bedroom one living room suite, with what I gathered to be the one of the best view Charm Churee could offer. The hike to the room however does require a certain fitness level. It was through 10 minutes of meandering steep steps, over sand and challenging corners that we arrived panting and breaking out in perspiration.



And the first think I could think of was to wash myself down in the outdoor shower. It was, outdoor very much indeed as the so many gaps in the bamboo walls offered quite a good view of my tan free fair shiny glow in the dark butt cheeks. The bathroom and toilet, nestled on rocks offered a most interesting wash experience ever, guaranteed.



Getting to town was like playing a RPG game. I had to look for signs in the jungle path that indicated “To Town”. It took a good fifteen minutes off the beaten track through several resorts before arriving onto sandy tracks that lead into bustling Mae Haad Bay. Through bushes, steep slopes, narrow path and nature, I was half expecting goblin gangs to spring out from behind hidden corners and I had to kill them with my magical sword or cast an exploding spell to wipe them out in a single attempt. The Mae Haad Bay township is laden with restaurants catering to the Caucasian tourist at Caucasian price. Its here you could locate bike and ATV rentals, pharmacies, a Seven-Eleven, packages that offers round the island snorkeling trips and such. In short, there were simply no free shuttle services between hotel and anywhere on this speck of an island in the gulf.


Breakfast was buffet, not a wide selection but not too bad really. And as for dinner, if one does not want to suffer the ordeal of trekking to town in the night and having to kill magical demons of the forest, dine at the Starlight Restaurant I would recommend. Dinner was pricey for Thais, but it was the average price if compared to urban countries elsewhere in the world. And the portion was huge, therefore dividing quantity by price, it was every bit reasonable. Would suggest sharing main course of spaghetti as an option for Thais who do not want to suffer cream and carbo overdoes. The meal setting itself was exotic enough alone. We sat on the floor dining in dusk colors for dinner, we looked over the sides and we could see fishies preparing for their nightly slumber through the clear waters. One thing I do have to mention, while we dined, the mosquitoes dined on us, the whole family of them, several generations across feasting on my arms, legs, neck and even though the clothing into my back. Must bring mosquitoe repellent unless you want to become swell man.





And daytime itself was a time to just laze around and bask in the sun. Enjoy the waters of private Jansom Bay. Jansom means Orange Plates in Thai and the place was named as such for some unknown reasons. I didn’t see any plates in the water, I did’t see any orange trees growing out of the sea. The bay itself has abundant sea life. Sat still in the water and the incredible amount of fish would have chewed off my nipples clean. So, I tried as much as I could not to sit still for more then 5 seconds. Waters near shore was already stunning but swimming out beyond where the bamboo platforms where, it was exquisite. Colorful corals and shoals of large fishes, giant clams with purple lips greeted us as we waddled out with our snorkeling gear. The sea was a clam, occasionally churning only when the distant diving or long tail boats sailed past. Downing that ice cold beer in the high afternoon sun was refreshing. The only problem was getting that beer ordered. The staffs here, neither good in Thai nor English, the lot are from Myanmar, cheap labor I guess.






All in all, Charm Churee was a good stay, and in fact I find myself having good calve muscles after staying there. Yes, Koh Tao may not offer the best waters crystalline like those of Similans, but definitely, it was a resort to rest and blend one’s soul to the rustic charms of the breathtaking scenery. Every morning, I woke to the sound of the sea and the glimmering specks of colors from coral fishes playing out front under my patio. And every evening I watched the vibrant reflections of sunset broken by silhouettes of long tail boats blaring past. In aw, I was in, in paradise again I had been.

Full photo sets here under Koh Tao Feb 2010 & Koh Tao Apr 2011.

Earthquake Bangkok

I felt it, my mates felt it, most of us in high-rise felt it and the folks in the north felt it most. A roof collapsed and someone died I was told. That was the effects of the recent quake more then a week ago on 24 Mar 2011 that happened in Myanmar measuring 7.0. During that night, I felt giddy and doubted my health. And when I saw my instant noodles swishing about in its foam bowl, I did thought of scrambling for the stairs. It lasted near to a minute but I was cool about it. It was… an experience.

The next few days, we talked and doubted about the safety of condominiums in Bangkok. I was told there was nothing to worry about. I asked if the high-rise could withstand a quake and what are the evacuations plans. My mates told me, no need to worry, there is no plan. Bangkok buildings will just collapse if a massive quake were to hit. The death would be instant. I…. tend to believe this, after living here for sometime, I know the shoddy works involved in projects and the short cuts they take to minimize cost so that the funds could be channeled “elsewhere”. So sad, but so the facts or fiction I leave for others to conclude.


And today we see in the papers the story of Bangkokians still snapping up the budget condo’s so aplenty. I was then told, Bangkokians forget easily. Do they? I don’t know if forget so easily one does here really. I think it’s more of the “lets get on and not worry so much” altitude of the people in this pleasant land. Why worry so much? If one worries about everything, then your life would be a passage of stress. Is this good or bad, one and many us “kiasu / kiasi” Singaporean would contemplate.

Beware the Shoddy Vets and Groomers

Lots of them, really here in Bangkok. Before you bring your beloved furball to any groomers, check around, ask around. I was at a pet hospital lately and I saw a Pomeranian with both front legs in cast. I asked, and she the owner told me some groomer dropped the dog and broke both legs.

I have seen several grooming shops advertising that they offer rabbit baths and grooming. Don’t bring my rabbit there my vet would say. Rabbits are very naughty and stubborn creatures. They give quite a struggle and most shops are not qualified to handle them. Again… rabbits will fall and die, if not suffer some permanent paralysis or life threatening injuries.


What about Vets? Surprisingly, there are heaps of them around. Small establishments are cheap, but not to say they are bad. Just make sure you do some research first. The live of a beloved animal is priceless. I would pay more for my rabbit’s dental then my own. Four times more to be exact. Thonglor Pet Hospital, from my own experience is good. Its an entire building dedicated to pets and they have all kinds of qualified specialist there who graduated from universities in Sydney down under.



The establishment is like a clinic for people, big clean halls, proper counters, proper clinical rooms and all that we pet lovers would see and trust our furballs to be left in the hands of proper care. It ain’t difficult to locate this hospital for it is located on the popular Thonglor street, and they have several branches around located throughout the metro.


And best of all, this place is expat friendly. They capable speaking language English with farangs. They saved my rabbit from dental complications.

Fireworks from Temple Grounds, ain't no Party

Numerous times in my many years here, I heard them fireworks go off from some nearby temple, and I could see puffs of smoke hardly visible in the bright blue sky. And so I was having lunch with my colleague one day and the fireworks went off.

Me: “Looks like the temple is having a party again, Thai temples always seem to have temple fair and party all year round.”

Colleague: “No, that no party, that is to inform the township that who ever that died will soon be roasted, so come to the temple to see the departed for one last time.”

I see.

CNY - go Singapore, Malaysia or Thailand?

Well, in case you are farang (ang moh, or Caucasian tourist as officially called) your best bet to have a good Chinese New Year would be Thailand.

Go Singapore, most shops closed on first day, so no shopping, not so much food. Worst, no festive mood because we go to jail forever for letting off firecrackers. Singapore is a “fine” country. We can’t even play them Hindu drums during Thaipusam else we get fined. Singapore thinks its noise pollution. The drums were supposed to mask out the horrific screams of the Hindus as they pierce themselves in the name of sacrifice.

Go Malaysia, which is where I was, really… no food. I was hunting for all the good hawker food. None whatsoever opened, because, public holiday. All “balek kampong” (go back to home town).

But in beautiful Thailand, it ain’t no public holiday. Office workers still work, shops remained opened so there is no lack of places to go. To get into the festive mood, just go to China Town and there’s a scene there. Firecrackers, we let them off yes we do. Although the dancing Lion speaks Thai, we still have a true Chinese New Year here.

My one bigger, I Win!!

So the border dispute between Thailand and Cambodia over the temple Wat Kaew Sikha Khiri Sawara had come to this. Both sides had been planting flags all over the temple laying claim. So, Cambodia planted some flags. Then discretely, Thailand counteracted and in the morning, Cambodians awake to the sight of twice as many more Thai national flags and guess what… Thailand’s one bigger, taller too. If this continues, soon we will have the 8th Wonder of the World - Temple Stabbed by Flags.

Thailand is Organized After All

You know, we Singaporeans come to Thailand, always complain complain. “Wah lau eh, why so disorganized one the traffic lah, the administrative system lah, the restaurant sucks lah no system, the business so jialat no one answer my call, sure no system lah… etc etc etc”. Stop whining. It’s been proven. Thailand when compared to other countries is more organized then you think.

Look at the current protest going on in Egypt. How the hell do you tell the anti vs pro Mubarak guys. Imagine, pro-Murabak guy shoots at crowd, then victim shout back “you pukimah!! I also pro lah!” Shooter then apologies to victim and brings victim to eat good murtabak with good fish curry (I presume the murtabak and roti prata are pro Mubarak’s food).

But in Thailand, no one shoots the wrong guys. Its obvious, red wears red, yellow wears yellow, and the dark forces wears black. So darn clear, we all know who to shoot.

ATMs at Suvarnabhumi Airport

Again, some bright ass decided to make life for people looking for ATM machines after immigration as painful as possible. I have written of this before, once when I checked in without drawing cash from ATM machines before immigration. Then I left the country without money because there were no ATMs in the departure area. And some months later, ATMs were finally installed and there were no more frustrating moments when one forgets to draw cash before leaving.

And then NOW, it happened again…. YESTERDAY. Not that there are no ATMs but all them fucked up purples boxes by the Siam Fucking Commercial Banks issues only them foreign cash!!! Screw the one who came out with this bloody absurd idea.

Waiting for the Winter

Have we noticed the change? Do we realize it had happened? Never had I expected that the effects of global warming can be witnessed in the short 7 years I had lived in Thailand, at least that’s what all my surrounding friends are talking about. This winter…. ain’t no winter. I remember from the year I arrived till about 3 years ago, during the months of November to January, motorcycle taxi sheds in Bangkok will have small camp-fire set up burning in some kind of make-shift bin. Motorcycle taxi drivers could be seen cuddled up keeping themselves warm around, palms stretched out absorbing the warmth and rubbing their hands together from time to time. We walked in the cool dense air, I could have coffee outdoors under the sun and not break a sweat. Sip hot coffee from a ceramic mug in cold winter, I loved it. Where is that experience now?

Back then, there were always friends going up north and coming back to share their tales of how cold it was the chilly air they breathed and the romantic atmosphere that such months offered. But just a week ago, friends coming back from Mae Hong Song told tales of extreme heat and only the early morning hours which offered a hint of winter’s mark.

I was happy back in end of October, when the cool breeze came suddenly unexpectedly. Even down south Hua Hin was cold and I could still remember having that hot Japanese soup with me friend in the cold night air. I was sharing with my mates how great living in this Kingdom had been and that part of Unseen Thailand is the secret winter debut that not many had known. How happily telling them I was, how wrong I now am. Even the Bangkok media had predicted that this year we will be experiencing the coldest and longest winter, obviously they had been wrong so far. The cool spell was over after the first week of November and it never came again.

The winter solstice is 21 Dec 2010. The sun is now low and darkness sets in about 6pm. But where, where are you now, the long awaited winter we are all eager for?

Old Town Chiang Khan

As presumed, we planned a winter trip up north. Keyword… winter… reality, perspire like pigs. End of November, should have been cold, but Buddha decided to turn the sauna on. And so we left Bangkok at 10pm in the night. Can’t recall the entire journey, but when I woke it was near 6, and up the mountains we went in the still cool air hoping it will last.




We were in Loei and joined the flock of local travelers for the sunrise. As we hike up the pathway, many of them were already strolling the opposite way, we missed the sunrise but nevertheless, the view was still breathtaking on Phu Ruea National Park. Misty, top of the peak I was as the sunrays contest the heavenly clouds to reach my lens. First stop of the day for many on their way to Chiang Khan.




Now Chiang Khan had been the talk of many lately. Her old rustic charms attracting many of the city folks, luring them with her backwards appeal into a world where the clock ticks slower. However, the dwellers of this village just ain’t too happy about it. They had been invaded, modernization had set in with the ever increasing loads of tourist. Even farangs had started to arrive in small numbers. The concrete buildings have started to sprout, over shadowing the original rows of aging wooden houses laid along the only street. Chang Khan will turn into another Pai soon as many had already reflected.




The monks walk their daily rounds just as the sun rise. Briskly, they collect alms from the local folks, strolling a slow pace taking in the clear morning air. In contrast to that, during the peak supposed to be cold period of November till January, things are very different. Monks get overfed like fishes. We tourist like to do everything that locals do just so as to do what we tourist are suppose to do. As a result, abnormal number of people lined up the streets and we dump loads of monk-feed into their small bowl. Never mind the cookies, sticky rice and what not had already piled up like mountain, tourist continued to squeeze whatever we can into any opening we chanced upon between the packs of nutrients. I myself was one of them and it was quite obvious the monks tried to walk as fast as he could pass all of us, refusing our offerings tactically. Some, I could tell was calculating how to walk past us beyond arms reach. We tourist had stressed the monks. There should be a Monk Overfeed Protection Act set up in Chang Khan someday.


Accommodation in Chang Khan is basic. Mainly, they are home stay. This is the second time I am at it and I am still amazed that all the elderly are wiling to sacrifice their night sleep for us. For a mere THB1500, they are willing to give up the bedroom and sleep all over the living room downstairs, scattered in a way like cats would do so in a large open area. There are not resorts on Chiang Khan as yet, but in time, there will be as popularity grows.



The old town is located next to the Mekong. So one could talk local to the locals and have a boat ride out on the river for THB1000. Sail next to Laos, see them kids play the water. Wave as we did as the citizens of Laos smiled and waved back. Cycling is the core activity there, for in Chang Khan is a long street where in the night it turns into a bustling market with restaurants, drinking joints and the so many peddlers. Colorful lights reflecting off old wooden charms, a kaleidoscope, it can be quite a picture.



A packed trip up north and back, sleep deprived we were back working the third day. 60% of the time spent in the van, stopping along the way for spots of unknown attractions. That’s the way we do it here, cheap.

Full photo sets available here under Old Town Chiang Khan Nov 2010.

Pink Flowers and Weird Rocks

Blog about August, some time ago. What’s on during August? Pink flowers season they say. All Thais flock to this place called Chaiyaphum to step on them flowers… no just kidding. Thais flock there to take in the full view of these pink petals blooming all over the slopes in the midst of fresh foggy mountain air. Flowers, so many, but you gotta catch them at the right time. With global warming, it’s hard to predict when they will bloom. We were told we went late for the season. The Dog Krachaio (that’s what they call them) had already started withering.




Chaiyaphum is highlands about 5 hours from Bangkok by van. That’s what we went in. My colleagues are very good (in fact all Thais are) at organizing such tightly pack trips over a short weekend, squeezing every bit out of off work time. We left midnight on Friday, our lives in the hands of the lone driver. Woke up crusty eyed at 5am on some mysteriously misty place, thinking our van had crashed and we were in Heaven. And when sense returned, we realized we were in some national park, Thai name too long, me brain no register.


August, Thais not only flock to Chaiyaphum for the flowers, but to also pose themselves dangerously on precariously looking rocks in order to take the picture of their lifetime. The forestry here in Thailand is good at making every rock sticking out over dropping cliffs an attraction. They are also ingenious in naming theses places, one of which I visited was “Cliff of Penis Shrinkage”. It’s a myth, my penis is still looking good down there.



Other then carrying genital related names, these are one of the few rocks in the entire solar system which has the most number of humans ever stood on them. Just wondering in my mind when a crack will appear and give way, taking a lovely couple along with it.




Rock features in this region are very peculiar in shapes. Thais looked at them and christened them Radar, World Cup something and whatever they can think of. Aiming through my viewfinder, I contemplate what freaky natural erosive phenomenon could have created them over the millenniums which had past.



Thais like waterfalls. And so, if there is one in the region, we flock there like frogs looking for a pond to spawn. In my restless state, again I cannot register the name of this place, but it was packed with people. As usual, Thais swim in their full daily attire, no bikinis for eye candy. Locals, only locals, hidden away from the knowledge of farangs the place is.


And what accommodation we lodged in? Travel local, stay local. Speak their language, live their language. We bunked over in “Home Stay”. Home Stay in Thai means staying in someone’s home literally. We invaded some farmer’s house for a small fee and the usual occupants young or elderly, will find some hole sleep else where. It was about THB 2,000 or so as I can recall for their sacrifice. Where do we get such incredible deals I asked? The web forums aplenty floating around they said. In written Thai they all are, reasons now we know why we expats can’t find good cheap deals.


They had simple food for us dinner, breakfast and lunch. We can squeeze in as many as we want, they will somehow get all the mattresses and blankets for us all. Just try not to think of the odor that came along with it. I was too tired to think of it anyways. Arrived late in the night and woke early 5am for out next leg of the journey.


Rocky rides, sleep deprived. We traveled them cliffs, flowers and rocks and falls. Had fun aplenty, all within a packed 48 hours. To so many places and back again. Monday, the next work day, was terrible. Will I do it again? Yes.

Full photo set here under Pink Flowers and Weird Rocks Aug 2010.