Frigging Discovery

In life, we discover many things along the way. As we transverse the passage of time, we hear, we question, we discover. Holy cow.. I didn’t know cock hair can grow white!!!

Yeas ago during our whacky school days, we often joke about nothing but genital objects. Subjects linked to genitalia are of often the best candidate for a good joke. Hey… you ever ask your ah-mah or ah-gong, their cheebye or lanchio hair are white or not? I mean look, they got a whole head full of them.. so does it apply to their privates?

We almost wanted to strip one of our classmates who genetically have white hair during adolescent to find out. But we never did.. and so this mystery remained in our childhood minds, carried on with us through the decades. It became an urban legend in my life. Thanks that classmate who never did answer our question truthfully. May your cock hair burn in hell.

Then exactly one day before my 36. I was crapping, I looked down, and I saw my very friggin first white strand of glorious curl.

I , NRIC blah blah blah, here-by declare that I solemnly process with pride, my very first strand of undercarriage silver glory, have thus officially reach the milestone in my existence on third planet from Sun, bow down to admit and carry the title of anything related by Thesaurus to uncle-hood. Amen.

Now I admit I am uncle. But only when my armpits turns silver.. shall I admit I am Ah-pek.

Oh my Buddha… are we old…..

Oui… Melvyn same age as me.. u got white hair already bo? Oui.. Antz.. u are Jurassic compared to me.. u got white hair bo? Regine… Orgu… time of your life yet? Bang Bang brothers.. u shaved your heads.. .do u shave your down there too? And if you do… do you first apply shaving cream? What about ur assholes? Do you shave ur assholes?

Any of you have white hair yet? … compare notes leh.. (I… have Ageingunclephobia..)

To my sister who reads my blog…. Dun ask.