Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Thais Love the Plastic Surgeon

Often on later night TV, you will get to see talk shows where they invite some already famous stars and talk about everything. And definitely some when in the program, photographs of before-famous will be flashed on the screen. You realized most of the time something is different, especially the breast size and the skin tone.

Thai people are very ok getting cut up and modified. One of gig’s SYT (sweet young things) friends had her ears redone, pulled back. That’s because she has (had) ears that, if capable of flapping, she will be airborne.

In hospitals when I visited the doctor for flu, the walls will be a jargon of colorful promotions with prices and pretty pictures. Breast enlargement THB4000 – 7000, double eyelids THB600, vagina modification / tightening / make like virgin / etc etc etc… about THB3000. They even have finger extension for THB 2400 and if they can do that to fingers… of course they can do that to your precious. Penis implant… THB150!!!! SGD$ 6 to make it what… big and fat? Endless possibilities under the surgeon’s knife, can I have vagina for a face thus reviving into reality the legendry Hokkien chee-bye-bin? Incredible prices… kind scary cheap to believe.

SYT friend of gig accidentally pushed her ear a little hard. Now she has one flappable ear. She has to redo the surgery.

Genetically, some people here have nostrils that can fit their thumbs in comfortably to dig the nose shit out. Noses are rather flat and holes are not like us Singaporeans, angled down. They have the base of their nose slanted up at steeper angle so riding on motorbikes means forced air induction of the normally aspirated lungs. My Chinese Thai friend told me this applies only to some of the darker native Thais from certain regions where their jaw bones are generally broader too. Imagine.. brown version of Spongebob Squarepants. So they will go surgery for their jaws and work on the nose. The general population here have a darker skin tone too. Thus many of them spend a lot of money going to spas to make themselves fair. And as for the fairer Chinese here, it’s popular to work on their boobs (most Chinese women have cute tiny pieces of meat on chest we called breast).

The idea of getting cut up and re-plastered like clay model eeks me. Why don’t they start from young? I have heard that the skulls of new born baby is soft like clay… so that means bones are soft I presume. So why not work the head of the new born like a plasticine and you can get that smaller jaw line. Pull the chin for that masculine look. Knock in the eyes with the base of your palm for deeper eye sockets like the Caucasian. Thumbs and fingers on the forehead to get Klingon from Start Trek looks, or enlarge the forehead to look like Chinese deities? Want your kid to be tall then pull the legs with some mild strength… or pull the precious so he will have 30 inch dick when reach adolescent. For identical twins, punch holes on their scalps with your fingers, one indent – Baby 1, two indents – Baby 2. But never have three indents or they become blowing ball.

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