Saturday, May 12, 2007

Beware the Bhangra Man

Some of us would remember our younger days, what our parents said to scare us for something we did or about to do wrong. Often in Chinese families the child would be threaten with “Don’t do that ah…. the Bangkali will come to catch you….” As to why, after 3 decades on earth wondering since childhood, I finally know the answer.

I was at the Thai Immigration Bureau extending my work permit. Since this is Thialand, waiting 6 hours for a queue of only 50 is common in government departments. I spent my time glued to the chair, reading a book. There was this irritating Thai Chinese boy talking non stop, screaming, squeaking, running. Looks to me more like a spider monkey then a boy. He went around, hitting all the empty chairs like Kitaro. Mother said in Thai “Sky, come here and don’t play.” Sky??!!! Reminds me of my ex’s brother.. Looks like Johnny Bravo and brain I bet looks also like Johnny Bravo…

Anyway, there were two Indian men behind me. I can hear them complaining. “Child very irritating, very naughty. Why are there children that behave like that… blah blah blah.” The stupid kid next then climbed up the empty chair beside mine. I was about to make him eat his own testicles when suddenly I saw a huge black hairy hand slowly come out between the gap of our chairs. Slowly and eerily fingers extended going for a grab of the boy, the Indian breath close behind me. Child freak out. Run away. Indians laughing, mum unaware. Then child started stomping all chairs again and ran all over. He even smack a standing lady in her butt “Piack!!!”. Everyone was staring at the child then, bewildered. Then he fell with a hard thud as he slipped on a puddle of mineral water he spilled earlier on. The Indians went “Yesssss!!!!!!!!!!” ..

Hwah…. See…? I don’t blame the Indians. I wanted to decapitate the child myself. If Chinese parents have something to scare the child about, what about the other races? Do Indians say “Don’t do that ah…. the Chinaman will come to eat your testicles...”?

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